Bye Bye Boobs

Sunday 6th April

Tired Kimmy.

Most of you are aware that the surgery day was changed to Monday.  However the Consultant called me this morning to tell me that we are back to Tuesday afternoon, pffft!

I've had a mad week, my feet haven't touched the ground.  Thanks to everyone who has kept me occupied and thanks so much for all the gifts.  It's like Christmas at my house!!  Every day a different parcel arrives, it's ace. Feeling very special. 

Many of you have commented on how well I am handling this and how strong I am. I am being realistic and positive but believe me I am scared, in fact I'm shitting myself. My mind is playing tricks on me, I am noticing every sensation or twinge in my body, the paranoia about it being somewhere else has set in. I'm told that this is very normal.....thankfully.

My thoughts in terms of losing my boobs and my hair have completely changed now, I really don't give a shit if this is what it takes to live. Maybe I will feel different when they have gone, dunno.  Just think though, by Tuesday evening the boobs will be off and so will the tumours!! This will be a huge relief because if the tumours are not there they cannot spread can they. Unless they have already, I'll find out soon enough.  The real positive is that I still feel well. Yes I'm tired but I think this is because of the stress of it all, the fact that its on my mind constantly.

I want you all to do something for me on Tuesday.  I want you all to check your boobs, every one of you, even the boys (yes boys can get breast cancer). Set an alarm on your phone to remind you. DO IT NOW!!  If you are not sure how to check ask google or follow this link http://coppafeel.org/boob-check/ If you do feel something don't panic it may well be nothing but do get it checked out.  Remember a few pages ago I mentioned that I had found a new lump in my other boob?  Well it turns out it was nothing, just breast tissue.  The new lump the clinic had found was somewhere else. Have a good look around the Coppafeel website too, its great.  Aimed at the younger generation yes, but just shows that Breast Cancer does not discriminate, anyone can get it regardless of age.  At the age of 37 I am quite young to get BC but its happening to more and more young people, even in their early 20's. Coppafeel also offers a free text reminder service to remind us to check our boobs every month. What a brilliant idea.

I'm going to spend the rest of today and tomorrow chilling out, indulging in my goodies and doing my best to keep positive.

I should be out of hospital on Thursday if not before. If I can lift my laptop and arms I will write again then.

Wish me luck!!